


The Civilian

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Language, Mentions of Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 11:14:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17058752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: You are just the civilian that the Winchesters saved a while back.  With nowhere else to go, they brought you to the bunker to help them with research and such. You try to help out as much as you can, but when you cross a line you didn’t know was there, and Dean explodes, it could have some extreme consequences.





	1. Chapter 1

You filled the bucket up with soap and water as you looked over to the beautiful black beauty that was parked in the Men of Letters garage.  Baby.  The ’67 Chevy Impala.  She had been through a couple rough hunts.  Her windows were covered in a thick layer of dust, as was her body.  Mud and…you didn’t want to think of what else, was dried on. 

 

So while Sam and Dean took a couple days to recoup after the last challenging hunt, you decided to offer a helping hand and give Baby a good wash.  Make her look like new for the next hunt.  And if it brought a smile to Dean’s face, well, that was just perfect.

 

You had to smile as you made your way over to the car, thinking of Dean.  It had been almost six months since you had come here, to this hidden secret lair.  After a nest of vampires had targeted you for their next meal, the Winchester’s swooped in and saved you.  And then Dean swept you off your feet, not that he knew about that, of course.

 

All but two of the nest were taken out.  It was a job well done, except now you had a target on your back.  So, instead of leaving you alone in your apartment, in the town where no one knew your name, they brought you here.  It was to keep you safe, at first.  But now, you were officially a part of Team Winchester, as Crowley called it. 

 

You didn’t do the big hunts, or even any hunts.  Research, cooking, cleaning, organizing…laundry.  Stuff like that was what you did.  The witch, Rowena, joked when she was here that you were a house wife, and then questioned which one was your husband.  The boys backed you up quickly, saying you were more than that, that you were part of the family now.  But you couldn’t help your heart fluttering at the idea of being a true Winchester, especially if it was through Dean. 

 

You sighed as you pushed those thoughts from your mind, turning that sting of unrequited love into passion and focus for your task at hand.  Making sure you got every spot off of Baby’s hood, made sure there were no streaks in her window.  You even went so far as to dust and sweep the interior, organize the arsenal in the back, and towel her dry.

 

When you were done, she shined like an onyx in the summer sun.  A true testament to the love and care that is put into her.  Dean would be so happy to see her like this, all shiny and—

 

“What the hell?!”  Your head snapped around and you saw Dean storming in.  He had on some baggy clothes, a bucket full of water, and a scowl that could stop a heart on his face.

 

“Dean…hey!”  You said casually.  “Sorry, I kinda beat you to it.”  You smiled at him, waiting to see that big dopey grin that he would use when you did something nice for him.  But instead you were met with a dangerous glare. 

 

“You cleaned Baby?”  His voice was low and predatory, as if you were that lone gazelle and he was the alpha lion.  It made you shiver in worry at what was to come next.  Instead of voicing your answer, you just nodded as you took a step away from the car, letting Dean look her over. 

 

He ran a hand over her hood and froze.  “What did you use?  Please god, tell me you didn’t Windex on her.  Did you even use any grease or wax?” 

 

The questions were shot out one after another, not giving you a chance to respond to any in a quick fashion, which only seemed to fuel Dean’s rage. 

 

“Why the hell would you do that?!” 

 

“I thought…I thought I was helping.”  You said simply.  It was the truth.  You just wanted to help a little bit, and you hated to see Baby all dirty.  You couldn’t understand what was so wrong, why he was acting like this. 

 

“Helping?!  Are you shitting me?!” 

 

“What’s going on out here?”  You turned and gave a happy sigh when you saw Sam walking out.  You took a few steps up to him, but before you could say anything, Dean went on his rampage about everything you had done wrong while washing the car.

 

One look at Sam’s reaction said the same thing you were thinking.  It was just a car.  It could be washed again, what was the big deal? 

 

“Well, we have a case, so…”

 

“Fine.”  Dean gritted out as he stormed past you and Sam, back into the bunker. 

 

“I…I just wanted to help, Sam.”  You whispered to him, looking up at that big teddy bear of a hunter as he gave you a sympathetic look. 

 

“I know.  But…Baby is Dean’s.  Next time, just let him do it, okay?  He tends to get worked up over Baby, you know that.  And he has a particular ritual when it comes to washing her.”  He gave you a quick one armed hug before picking his bag back up and tossing it in the trunk.  “We will be gone for about a week, are you alright with that?” 

 

“Yea.  It’s actually perfect, wanted to do some cleaning anyway.  Be safe.”  You offered before heading in.  You were actually glad they were leaving, you were happy to avoid any conflict that would have arose from Dean over your apparent lack of expertise in washing Baby.  In hindsight, actually, you knew it could have gotten a lot worse.  You saw him blow up on Sam one time when he found a granola bar wrapper under the seat.  All in all, you dodged a bullet.

 

Or so you thought.

 

You heard Dean mumbling as he packed, so you stopped by his room.  “I hope the hunt goes well.  Be safe, okay?”  You offered quietly.

 

“Yea.  Well, try not to fuck up anything else while we are gone, okay?”  He growled back out as he zipped up his bag. 

 

“I’m sorry, what?”  Now, normally you weren’t a very confrontational person, but his tone, the way he had been acting.  That was the final straw.  “I was trying to help, Dean.  You know you could say thank you instead of acting like an ass.” 

 

“An ass, huh?”  He snapped his head around as his pulled his bag up on his shoulder.  And for a just a split second, you enjoyed the sight, seeing how his muscles moved when they lifted the item up, but it was gone in a flash as he stormed up to you.  “Well, at least I’m not a fuck up.”

 

“I am not a fuck up!”  You screamed at him. 

 

“Oh yea, how about what you just did to Baby?  If I’m lucky, it will rain and wash off the crap you put on her, and even after that, I’m going to be dealing with soap spots and scum and shit.”

 

He took your silence as a cue and just kept going.  “And it’s not like this is the first time.  How about that cursed box?!” 

 

“I didn’t know it was cursed!”  You defended, remembering the day that you almost died in the bunker after touching a cursed pair of scissors. 

 

“And the fire you started in the kitchen?  And the fucked up system you did in the library, I still can’t find anything!”  If he saw the tears welling up in your eyes, he didn’t acknowledge them, instead, he just kept hitting on every little thing you had messed up with over the last few months. 

 

It hurt your heart, hearing how he remembered all of those things, how it seemed to bother him so much.  “I’m sorry…I didn’t know I was such a burden.”  Your fight was gone now, replaced with a mild tempered girl that was standing in front of him, doing her best not to cry. 

 

“Yea, well one of these days sorry ain’t going to cut it.  And you better damn well hope it is a little mistake and doesn’t cost lives, cause that’s what happens in the hunting world, sweetheart.  So you better get your head out of your ass or leave, because we can’t sit here and babysit you all the time.  We have fucking job to do.”  And with that he shoved past you, storming down to the garage. 

 

You just stood there for a moment, listening to Dean’s words over and over and over again.  It was true, you did make a lot of mistakes, but you have learned from them, and you have learned a lot since then.  But maybe it wasn’t enough?  Maybe it was time to leave, to stop relying on them, to free them from the burden.  That question rattled in your brain as you walked down to your own room, silently debating on whether or not it was time to leave. 

 

000

 

It took twenty minutes into the drive that Dean felt like a piece of shit.  He kept sighing, debating about turning around so he could apologize.  God, why did he always have to act like an ass!  It was a recurring theme with him, especially when it came to you.  You would do something nice, he would be an ass about it.  Make a joke, or say something bad, or blow up…like he did over Baby. 

 

Honestly, when he saw you working on her, wiping away the stray spots of water…he honestly thought it was hot as hell.  And instead of saying something sexy or sweet, he went and became a dick.  It was his natural go to with you.  He wanted you, not in a take it and leave kinda way, but in a…breakfast in bed, cuddled up during a movie, date night kinda way…and that terrified the fuck out of him. 

 

So he lashed out, especially about Baby.  And all that other stuff he talked about…the fire in the kitchen, that was because you misread the time needed to bake a homemade pie.  And although you were a wreck after it, seeing you all covered in flour and put out, it was kinda adorable. 

 

And the library…that was just a flat up lie.  He loved the way you organized it.  Now, instead of some useless alphabetical crap, it was organized by monster.  Need stuff on vampires, top right of the third bookshelf.  The only one who couldn’t figure out the damn system was Sam, and even after that you put up sticky notes to help direct him. 

 

The curse box…okay, he was still a little pissed over the curse box.  Not because you opened it and touched the damn scissors, cause honestly, that was on him.  He should have explained what those were when you started cataloguing them.  But the fact that you went after him with the scissors…  He brought his hand up and casually ran it over his head, feeling the slight dip in the hair where you managed to cut part of the hair off.  Seriously, why couldn’t you have gone after Sam…that would have been hilarious!  He needed a haircut anyway. 

 

And yea, although you had used the wrong cleaner, and yes, it would leave scum on the hood he would have to get off later…even though you used that Windex crap on her windows, didn’t wax her, or polish her rims, even Dean had to admit that Baby looked amazing.  _Oh shit_ , he just realized, did you clean in interior too?! 

 

 _I am such an ass_.  He looked over to Sam and sighed.  “Dude, we gotta turn around.”  He hit the blinker to signal he was taking the next turn, but Sam stopped him.

 

“We can’t!  People are dying, Dean, we have to get there tonight!” 

 

“You don’t understand.  I said…I said some really shitty things, that I didn’t even mean, and I was an ass, and I…I have to apologize.”

 

“Yea, I know.  I heard.  Hell, I think the whole county did.  But we have to take care of this.  You can call her tonight when we get there, okay?”  Sam was pissed at his brother for what he said, but that didn’t change the fact that this little town in the neighboring state had lost four people in the last two days, all kids, and it didn’t seem to look like that pattern was going to be changing.  Dean made a mess of this and he would have to apologize, of course, but it would have to wait. 

 

000

 

It was three in the morning before Dean even had a chance to call you.  When they arrived and checked into the hotel, he went to call, but then Sam said there was another person dead, one of the parents, and then the questioning and the morgue and the stake out…it just kept piling up until now. 

 

Dean had slipped outside, letting Sam crash on one of the beds as he dialed your number.  It rang a couple times before it went to voicemail, as he figured it would.  You were an early to bed, early to rise kinda girl.  But even still, three in the morning was just too early, but Dean didn’t want to wait.

 

“Hey!  You’ve reached Y/n.  Leave your name, number, and—.”

 

“NIGHTMARE!”

 

Dean smiled as he heard his own voice scream out to get onto your voice message. 

 

“Dean!  Shut up!” You laughed for a moment.  “And your message, and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”

 

He remembered that day, it was the day he was teaching you how to set up the phones, how to answer them properly if they needed ‘clearance’ from their bosses.  It was a fun day, just a day with the two of you to hang out.  One of his favorites, actually.

 

The beep sounded and Dean began.  “Hey, Y/n.  It’s me.  Listen…I…I’m sorry.  I would have liked to done this in person, but we had to get going on this hunt, but I didn’t want to just leave it alone.  I am so sorry for what I said.  I freaked out on you, and said those things, and most of them, honestly, were lies.  It’s just…when I see you and you do things like that…I…God, this sounds like a chick flick.  I’ll just…we will talk when I get back, okay.  Just, just call me when you get this.  And…I really am sorry, Y/n.  So sorry.  I’ll, uh, I’ll talk to you later, okay?  Just, call me when you get this.  Bye.” 

 

000

 

Dean’s phone never rang the next day, or the day after.  You never called him back, so the drive back, Dean broke every speed limit, every law he could, just to get back to the bunker sooner.  Sure, Sam had some things to say, but after explaining you hadn’t called him back, and after you didn’t return Sam’s calls either, they were both a bit worried. 

 

And they had reason to be. 

 

Dean ran into the bunker and searched high and low for you, but you were nowhere to be found.  It wasn’t until he stepped into his own room that he even saw the note.  It was written on one of those colorful sticky notes you loved to use.  The color, you always joked, was happy and would lift the spirits.  But with the message it carried, the color did nothing to stop the pit that grew in Dean’s stomach. 

 

_Dean,_

_You were right.  I have been a burden lately.  I’m sorry for that.  You have important stuff to do, and I’ve been in the way.  But not anymore.  Good luck in your hunting, and stay safe._

_Y/n_

 

To say a manhunt had begun after that was an understatement.  Sam tried tracking your cell, which was left in your room, calling local police stations to search for your car, everything.  Meanwhile, Dean called any hunter friend, Cas, and even Crowley, asking if they had heard anything or seen anything.  Unfortunately, thanks to Cas’ little rib tattoos and a few hex bags gifted to you by Crowley, neither of them could track you anymore. 

 

Dean slammed his fingers down on the keys against his computer, looking at a digital map of places he would think you would go.  He couldn’t let you go like this…he had to apologize, he had to get you back…

 

“Dean.  I found her.”  Sam’s voice was flat as he spoke.  His eyes seemed emotionless as he looked to his brother.

 

“Where is she?” 

 

A six hour drive, and about a hundred steps later, Dean was by your side.  The tears welled up in his eyes as he looked down at you.  Your hair was pulled back away from your shoulders, your eyes were shut, like you were sleeping. 

 

But you weren’t sleeping.

 

“It was blood loss.”  The coroner said.  “There were puncture marks on her neck, I believe that was where the blood was drawn out of.  It looks like some type of hypodermic needle.”

 

Vampire.  Dean let the tears fall as he reached out a hand to brush a stray hair from your face, cupping his hand on your cheek.  You were cold.  So cold.  You weren’t supposed to be cold.  You were supposed to be warm and happy and smiling.  Not this…anything but this. 

 

“Dean?” 

 

He stepped away from you and turned, taking out the closest thing to him, the tray of tools the morgue would use to prep you for burial.  The tools went flying across the room as he kicked and hit more things, destroying the room.

 

“Dean!”  Sam was on him quickly, wrapping him up in his arms, trying to hold him still.

 

“It’s my fault!”  Dean cried out.  “If I hadn’t said those things, if I had turned around and apologized, she would still…she wouldn’t be…”  A sob left Dean as his knees buckled and he fell to the floor.  Sam went down with him, just holding his brother as he wept for their lost friend.  “It wasn’t supposed to be like this.  It wasn’t.  I was gonna apologize, and be honest…and tell her…I was gonna, Sam… She was…she didn’t deserve this…she…she’s just…she’s gone.  Why?  Why did it have to be her?” 

 

It was two days later that Dean…and Sam, Cas, Crowley, and even Rowena, stood outside the bunker.  Together they stood in silence as they watched.  They watched as the funeral pyre burned, releasing your body and soul from this world. 


	2. Chapter 2

_It was two days later that Dean…and Sam, Cas, Crowley, and even Rowena, stood outside the bunker.  Together they stood in silence as they watched.  They watched as the funeral pyre burned, releasing your body and soul from this world._

 

Dean’s lungs struggled to pull in air as he bolted upright in his bed.  He struggled to breathe, practically having a panic attack as he looked around the room.  He wasn’t in the bunker, like he thought…he was in a motel.  It looked familiar.

 

Dean quickly reached out and snatched up his phone, checking the time.  It read 4:02, but the date caught him.  It was…wait…he looked around as he then looked down at his phone and flipped it open, searching for the recent calls list.

 

There it was.  A call to you, about an hour ago…everything that happened…it was a dream.  A horrible, terrible dream…  Dean froze as he looked over to Sam, remembering the dreams he used to have, and a thought clicked in his mind.

 

What if it wasn’t a dream?  What if…

 

His mind didn’t finish the sentence.  He didn’t even wake Sam as he got up, threw his pants on and tore out of the motel and ran out to Baby.  He quickly ran his hands over the hood, feeling the texture of that weird soap you used on her.  It didn’t happen…yet.

 

He had to make sure it didn’t.

 

000

 

The drive back seemed to go by in a flash, especially when Sam called him, having woke up in the motel room with no brother or car to be seen.  Dean explained what had happened, his dream, his fears, how he needed to apologize, tell you everything…surprisingly, Sam didn’t argue, just told him to be back quick, he would continue the hunt on his own. 

 

Dean was well collected until he pulled into the garage.  He didn’t take the time to see if any of the cars were missing, he just bolted inside, calling out your name.  He checked your room.  Nothing.  Kitchen, nothing. Library, nothing. 

 

“No…no, no, no…”  Dean was freaking out.  You were gone, he had to find you…but...where?  The dream never told him where you were found, it didn’t tell him where you went.  He would have to find you on his own.  He tried to think back to the dream, all the details he could. 

 

The note.

 

Dean took off in a run to his room.  That was where it all started, the colorful note on his bed.  He could do it, he could find you!

 

And he did.

 

He stopped in his doorway as he saw you curled up on his bed, sleeping peacefully.  You had one of Sam’s old hoodies on.  He had given it to you when you first came, since you didn’t have any spare clothes, and you kept it after that.  Hell, you had most of Dean’s old shirts as well, and he would bet you were wearing one underneath the hoodie.

 

Dean sighed deeply as he let the panic run from his veins. You were here, you were safe, that was what was important.  He took a deep breath of air as he walked in and sat on the bed next to you.  His eyes wandered over you, taking in every detail he could, enjoying how your mouth was slightly open as you took a deep breath, how your hair draped over your eyes like a curtain.  He reached out and slowly tucked the hair behind your ear and smiled as he leaned down and whispered your name.

 

“Y/n?  Y/n, wake up.”  He gave your shoulder a little shake and watched as your eyes opened slowly, taking in where you were and what was going on.  There was a moment when you looked at him, he could see it in your eyes, the sadness at what he had said, but then it was replaced by panic when you realize you had been caught in his room.

 

“Dean?!”  You snapped up, narrowly missing Dean’s head with your own before you stumbled out of the bed.  “I’m –I’m sorry.  I just…I get…it’s strange being here alone…in here…feel safe…”  You mumbled as you played with the cuffs of Sam’s old hoodie.

 

It was adorable, Dean decided.  Seeing you all flustered and in the too big hoodie, you looked so nervous and embarrassed, and he loved it.  “It’s alright.  You are welcome to stay in here…even when we aren’t gone…if you would like.”  It was Dean’s turn to be a bit uneasy as he saw you take in the information. 

 

“You…want me to stay in your room?” 

 

Dean lifted his hand up and waited for you to take it before he pulled you down to sit next to him.  “I owe you…so many apologies…I don’t even know where to start.  But everything I said, Y/n…you have to believe me…I just…I panic around you, you know?  I can’t get it all out.  I don’t do this.  I don’t know how.” 

 

You looked to Dean, not sure if you were understanding everything clearly, but if you were, you were very happy.  “Dean, what are you trying to say?”

 

“I’m trying to say I’m sorry.  For everything.  All the crap I said and the mean things I snapped at you with, I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean it.”  He deflated as he spoke, just looking to you as if you were the answer to all the problems.

 

“Then…why did you do it?”  You questioned simply.

 

“Because…”  He took a deep breath and sighed, running his hands through his hair as he resigned himself to this chick flick moment.  “Because I like you…a lot.  I want to be, more, with you.  And I don’t know how to react when you get all cute and adorable and sexy and I can’t function because of it.”

 

Your eyes widened as he spoke.  And boy did he keep talking.  He walked you through all of the moments he thought you were amazing, all the stuff he loved about you, all the stuff that frustrated him, how he wished he could act, how he wished he had the balls to ask you out properly.  Once those gates were open, there was no shutting them.  But there was one phrase he uttered in his long speech that made both of your freeze.

 

“I just…I don’t know how to deal with how much I love you.” 

 

You gasped when he said it, your eyes glued onto him as he slowly turned and looked at you.  His eyes were searching yours as if you had the answer, because he was lost as he finally came to that realization.  He loved you.  Now the question was, what were you going to do about it?

 

You slowly leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips, savoring the soft feeling and warmth, the taste of whiskey and burgers.  It was a quick but sweet kiss, but it was perfect.  “I…I feel the same…I have for a while now.” 

 

Dean tried to fight the goofy grin that stretched across his face when he heard that, but it didn’t work.  He smiled like a fool before wrapping you up in his arms and holding you close.  “I swear to you, I will do everything I can to make up all the crappy stuff I said, and I will treat you right and I will protect you…always.” 

 

000

 

Dean woke up in his bed in the bunker with a happy smile on his face.  All the things from earlier that morning came flooding back.  Nothing intimate happened, but you and Dean laid down on his bed and spoke of things to come and feelings and wants.  It was totally chick flick, but Dean didn’t give two shits about that.  He just, he couldn’t believe that you were his…girlfriend now.  Wow…he had a girlfriend.  Who would have guessed?

 

Dean sat up when he realized you weren’t with him in bed, you must have gotten up and were doing stuff already.  He knew he couldn’t stay any longer, he had to get back to the case, but he wanted to say goodbye…a proper goodbye to his…girlfriend… before he left.

 

He made his way down the hallway and looked into a few rooms before he finally found you cooking in the kitchen.  You had some flour on your cheek, your apron was covered in something, but you had a big grin on your face as you placed some containers in a bag. 

 

You looked up as he walked in and smiled.  “Good morning!  I have some coffee made for you.  Sam called to check in, said you had to get back right away, so I figured I could fill a travel mug for you, if you want?” 

 

Dean didn’t say anything, just walked around the counter and pulled you against him before kissing you sweetly.  His arms tightened around your waist as you wrapped your arms around his neck. 

 

You couldn’t help but chuckle as he pulled away, pressing his head against yours.  “I’ll tell Sam you were very eager to get back to work.”  You joked before giving Dean another quick kiss.  “And if that don’t work, maybe the pie will help?” 

 

“Pie?”  That caught Dean’s attention.  You motioned back to the bag and smiled as you watched his face light up as you told him you made him a fresh apple pie for the hunt, it was served up into single serving containers so they could eat it whenever.  “You, Y/n l/n, are the best girlfriend, EVER!” 

 

You laughed as he hugged you tightly, giving you another sweet kiss before you handed him the pie and his coffee and sent him on his way.  Who would have guessed it, you thought to yourself as you heard the Impala pull away…you were dating Dean Winchester.

 

000

 

Sam was typing away at his computer when Dean finally arrived again.  He walked in with a bag and a mug and gave his brother a big grin.

 

“What?”  Sam asked as he reached out for the bag.  Since Dean took the car, he didn’t have anywhere he could go for food, so that homemade pie was sounding delicious. 

 

“You won’t believe—.”

 

“What the hell?!”  Sam shouted.  He gave his brother the best bitch face he could muster as he spoke.  “You ate it all?!  That was an entire pie, Dean!  In five hours!” 

 

“Hey!”  Dean defended, a proud smirk on his face.  “It was my girlfriend who made it!”  Dean enjoyed the moment of shock and then happiness that sprung on Sam’s face.  But couldn’t help but roll his eyes when Sam muttered ‘finally’ under his breath. 


End file.
